Have you ever just sat somewhere and listened? I mean really listened. What do you hear?

We are all surrounded by noise and that noise can have a positive or negative effect on us. I have started really listening. Externally and internally to the noises surrounding me.

Externally: As I sit in my office at home writing this article, I am acutely aware of the external noises. Some irritate me, some bring me joy. The washing machine is on in the garage connected to my office. The pool pump is running to clean the pool. I hear the fridge in our garage making a noise, aware that it is near to the end of its useful life. My son is outside playing on his bike pretending that he’s on an obstacle course. He is talking to himself and I can sense his joy. My eldest daughter is on my office floor reading a book and I am enjoying that she is here with me.
Continue reading The Noise Surrounding Me →

I remember as a child whenever I had a wave of night terrors I would have trouble imagining my room as the ordinary bright place it was in the daylight.… The hells specialize in making us feel things that aren’t true. I don’t have night terrors anymore but I’m discovering that, as adults, a lot of us deal with darker states–whether it be depression, anxiety, spiritual struggles or even mental challenges. Whatever the cause, when we are feeling far from the Lord and can only see all the things that we’ve done wrong this week, this month or since childhood it can be hard to truly believe that life will look and feel differently in the light of more truth. In moments like that I also have a hard time remembering that the less happy times are permitted along the journey and they are not stopping points themselves but something that will give way to brighter states afterwards.

Now, even while trying to find what to write about this time I wasn’t quite sure that I had anything helpful to share. And then suddenly the clouds lifted in a new way.
Continue reading New Beginnings →

Who doesn’t know the desire for a good meal, dished up with love and shared with good company? An acquaintance of mine recently did an informal poll on social media, asking if people minded eating alone. While a few conveyed enthusiasm, most said they preferred eating with friends or family. In my growing years, our dinner table was a sacred place where individual pursuits were put aside in favor of community bonding—thanking the Lord for our blessings, listening and talking, sharing ideas, debating, laughing, and enjoying each other—while savoring our meal. For many Americans, my present self included, life’s rapid pace means that eating is often mindless and solitary. It’s easy to forget that sharing physical nourishment with others has a way of nourishing the spirit as well as the body. 

I’ve recently had a small, but persistent, digestive health issue that has made me change my diet and rethink my eating habits. I realized that I, a single lady with a busy housemate, was eating most of my meals alone. I didn’t take time from work to eat with my co-workers, since I don’t get a paid lunch period and didn’t want to make up the lost time. I sometimes go out to a late dinner with my tango group, or occasionally eat out with friends, but I realized that most of the time, eating had become a perfunctory action for me. Yes, I cooked nutritious food, but I ate it in a mindless way, usually as I prepared to run out the door to an evening activity. So I started making efforts to eat lunch with my coworkers. I organized a community potluck in the park. I sometimes call a family member while cooking or eating. Now, in addition to making more effort to connect with others over meals, I am more mindful about giving thanks, chewing well, breathing deeply, enjoying the flavor, and not overeating. 

Continue reading Food for Thought →

This year, I’ve been meditating on how peace is often found in the tension between two extremes. In March I wrote about finding peace in the tension of perspective, between the truths that every moment matters and it’s all about the big picture. This tension is one I felt particularly keenly in my role as a parent.

This month, I’m writing about another two simultaneously true extremes, and my search to find peace in the tension between the two: God’s sovereignty vs our free will.

For me, the tension of these two extremes is felt most keenly in the reality of suffering.
Continue reading Peace in Tension: Suffering →