“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the LORD. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55: 8-9
For a woman in her child bearing years, miscarriage is a topic she will never want to think about, let alone discuss. Sadly, it’s very common. According to the American College of Obstetricians and my Gynecologist, 1 in every 4 women has a miscarriage during their child bearing years. I was able to become pregnant very easily and had quick child births with my first two sons, so I had no idea that a miscarriage would ever happen to me till we started trying for our third.
My third pregnancy started just like my first two, but when I went to the doctor after the seventh week of my pregnancy she said that there was no heart beat and the amniotic sac didn’t look normal. She said I should come back in a week and she would be able to tell for sure if it was a miscarriage or not because then she could compare the measurements she was taking. That word broke my and my husband’s hearts. We were shaken to the core of our beings. We kept asking if we had done something wrong; I kept asking if I didn’t eat the right foods or I was too stressed. The doctor assured us that it’s nothing we did wrong but things like this just happen.
When we went back to see her the following week, she confirmed that I was having a miscarriage and that she saw blood in my abdomen. My husband was with me and we looked at each other with sad faces and heavy hearts. Then he said to me it’s not meant to happen this time. Now the trouble was to tell our family we are not having a baby. I blame myself on this one: I took the 12-week rule for granted this time because I had two healthy and normal pregnancies. I told my very close family members.
After we heard the bad news we had to also share it with all our family members. They were all sad and concerned for us. I told a family member not to worry because The Lord has a plan for us and it didn’t include this baby, and this close family member said, “don’t say that, which God will take a baby from her mother’. I didn’t want to blame or be mad at the Lord because I believe He knows what I can handle and He doesn’t give me too much more.
My boys were a tremendous part of my healing! I look at them and a sense of love and great fullness overtakes me. I have to help them to grow up and know and love the Lord. My husband was also so supportive and understanding. He helped me emotionally and physically and we leaned on each other and our faith in the Lord. The rest of my family was very supportive and loving.
Personally I believe with all certainty that if you believe in someone (The Lord) who is higher than yourself you always come back on the other side stronger after a tragedy. Also, it helps you to focus on the important things in life.